We don’t need a big Plan B, C or D; we don’t need any plans at all. All we need is the courage to make small changes, the time to notice the positive differences and the acceptance that moving forwards can also include stopping points, roundabouts and u-turns. It doesn’t matter how we get to the final destination, or how long it takes. We just need to love ourselves at each point and celebrate each milestone.
How have you moved forwards?
Moving forward is not easy, it takes work and intention to realise that you need to move forward from your grief in order to live a happy life. Adding self-care into your life can be a way of moving forward gently. In the meditation, Bindi Shah will guide you to explore what aspects of self-care you would like to bring into your everyday. Gentle things which can be done, with ease, and will bring you a little joy and care.
You can find the list of Bindi’s affirmations here
‘Hello You’ is a simple movement session, led by Victoria Robinson supporting you to connect a little bit more with your own body, noticing how your body responds as you bring your attention to your own self. Anyone can join in, whatever your mobility level, whatever your relationship with your body, whatever your energy level, whether you have an injury or not. As your movements, your way of noticing your body is unique, there is no right or wrong way to do this – it’s just your way.
YES! FACT! Using creativity and the healing arts help process:- feelings, goodbyes and even support bringing in new hellos - all with kindness and much gentleness. In the webinar Helen Segal will be talking and facilitating a workshop on how to start turning toward using the healing arts and how to move forward from loss and grief. This workshop is for the beginner, for those of you who know the healing arts intimately and all of those in-between.
Acceptance is an awkward word because we don’t want to accept we will not be a parent or that our life is not how we dreamt. Perhaps we can twist it to mean accepting our emotions may continue to be triggered but on less occassions with less intensity. Accepting our heart will have always have a space where our children live but don’t exist. In this webinar Stephanie Joy Phillips, Victoria Firth, Kat Brown, Lana Walker and Lucy North will talk about how being childless is part of who we are, but not the whole of us. Our childlessness is something to live with but to not be ruled by.
My love, Life has taken an unexpected turn. You and I will not have the children we imagined, talked about together. Dreamed of. Our life will not take the course we had planned.
I learned around 1992 at age 22 that I likely would not be able to have children on my own. At that time there were very limited options to fix the issues that prevented me from conceiving.
My name is Rianna Hijlkema, originally from The Netherlands, but currently living in Colombia. I’m a serial entrepreneur and a nomad since 2011.
When I turned 50 at the beginning of this year, I set myself 50 mini-challenges to refocus my life on nice positive things.
At the Intersection of grief is love, hopelessness is empowerment.
They want to help!
to fix your brokenness, to get you back into the flow
so you aren’t uncomfortable (to them) anymore
This is a mixed media piece I created when exploring my feelings around the removal of my fallopian tube and discovering I could no longer conceive children naturally.
A few years ago I was sitting on my couch, working on my laptop and a notification popped letting me know I had a new email.
The front door closed softly behind her as she left. I was left with the residue of her words. Not sharp, nor blunt, just matter-of-fact as if what she had to say was the most obvious thing in the world.
I am now heading towards year 3 of being CNBC, however, I wanted to focus on the first 2 years, as grief expert David Kessler says that he sees “early grief” last at least that long.
In my story, I will tell you: I am childless, divorced, pansexual, low-income. Endure chronic disease: Thyroid, parathyroid, fibroids, osteoporosis, most recently, Meniere’s disease. This is a story.
Goodbye Molly Harriet.
Farewell Matilda Elizabeth.
Sweet dreams Arthur Jonathan.
So long Finn James.
As my husband and I started our second egg retrieval process, we knew we were running out of options and energy to continue with our fertility treatments.
26 yıllık Çocuksuz hikayem var benimde. Evlendiğimde 19 yaşındaydım.
(in Turkish with English translation)
I hear your call,
Like you held me up every time I would fall,
Scrapped knees on concrete,
While across the school walls wisteria creeped,
It’s low tide. I’m out of reach.
I reach out and find connection.
Two waves forward.
To move forward, I had to stop making big changes and release expectations around external factors that I thought could fix me and fill the loss.
I’ve always loved to write. Infact, one time a fortune cookie told me that I would be an author, but it didn’t predict this future.
A conversation between Karin Enfield De Vries and Michale Hughes on their thoughts around why childless and childfree are two totally different, but equally valid terms for those living without children.
Hello everyone, my name is Helen. It has been 7 years since I knew I needed to move on from trying to have children and that I would never be pregnant and be a mother.
It was one of those quietly spoken dreams. Bearly auidble, until I could hear nothing else.
After two years of trying for a family, we (my husband & I) got sucked onto the IVF production line.
My submission is a series of three paintings, each representing a stage on a journey beyond failed fertility treatment.
It’s a forever journey, it just goes on, but slowly and steadily it falls into place, connections made through trauma can become healing and incredible.
Looking back on my life and childless path, I always knew that having children would be difficult for me.
I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1998, and as a consequence, was not able to have children.
It wasn't planned this way, that I would get divorced in my mid-thirties, that during the time when I wanted a child from my ex-husband, it didn't work out right away.
Menopause can be an incredibly challenging time for many women, and particularly for those of us who are involuntarily childless.
I am not an artist (clearly). One day I was doodling and drew this. I didn't really think about what I was drawing and then looked at it to see what it meant to me.
I’ve been on long winding journey of sunshine and shadows, deep into the depths of life, my mind and soul.
I blame my indecisiveness on the stars. I am a classic example of an oscillating Libran, having struggled my entire life when it comes to making big choices…
Walking in nature, taking one step after the other. Watching nature unfold in the finest ways. Feeling small, feeling good, feeling happy - looking at the canyon.
The sun is setting, casting long shadows on the deck. My nieces’ and nephews’ laughter makes the scene feel light and happy. I, however, don’t feel that way.
Do you have kids?
No, I used to appoligize
With a smile