Have you found one thing to commit to each day that makes you smile? Have you been in a situation and suddenly realised you stayed and laughted rather than ran and cried? Can you accept an invite you previously tore up, or do you just feel a difference in your heart and outlook. Moving forward doesn’t have to be a big plan B, it could be a small step, hop, skip or jump.
How have you Moved Forwards?
Sherrie Laryse’s guided meditation combines traditional yogic meditation practices with modern psychology and western neuroscience. The resulting meditation practice has been proven to assist people to meet, cope with, and process their heavy emotions. As such, it has been used largely for Post Traumatic Stress. Suitable for both experienced meditators and those who have never even thought about meditating before!
In this online discussion Cristina Archetti, Laura Curtis, Nisa Darroux, Robin Hadley, and Sarah Roberts explore what it means to do research with and about the childless-not-by-choice community. We base our conversation around the following two questions: 1. What is the value of research on involuntary childlessness conducted by researchers who are involuntarily childless? 2. What insights do we, as childless researchers, bring to the table, and how do those insights help us, as a community and as individual researchers, move forward?
Join Rianna Hijlkema and Helen Gallagher, for a one-hour long live Webinar in which they talk about how they moved forwards (and sometimes fell backwards) in their childless journey. Two women, two different stories, two different countries and one common fact; they are both childless not by choice. From hiking trails, to podcasts, from community building to therapy sessions, from depression to happiness, they've seen it all and it's brought them to where they are today.
Being childless we can find ourselves focused on the end of something, be it our fertility window or finding Mr or Mrs Right. So when we take that step of crossing the line of hoping to become a parent to knowing our dreams have gone we can feel stuck in a void. Then we hear people talk about their Plan B, and the suggestion that something bigger and better is what await us in our future. But what if plan B never seems to appear or we work our way desperately through the alphabet and find ourselves waving goodbye to Plan Z? Join Stephanie Joy Phillips, Sheri Johnson, Lana Manikowski, Carrie Brauninger and Becky as we discuss what happens when there isn’t a Plan B (or z)
In mid-June, a robin built a nest atop an outdoor lamp on my back deck. The nest then sat empty for more than a week.
In 2012 my husband and I agreed it was time to start a family. I was excited.
You are undoubtedly familiar with the words and concept of 'being triggered.' It refers to a cue or event that precipitates difficult emotions.
Truthfully, I never saw myself "moving forward".
I'm failing at finding a 'new dream'.
I'm failing at building a 'different future.'
But here I am moving forward.
I started to move on when I stopped crying. I had cried for years. It went on and on. I’d not read any books on the need to grieve. This was the 1980s and I’m not sure such books existed. I just cried.
Comparison is the thief of all joy they say - it’s true. Don’t look back look forward - another good one. Don’t dwell on the past. Look forward you are only going that way. The only way out is through!
Searching for another goal that will fill this hole, I feel that I need to find myself again as I lost myself when I lost you.
Are you a working parent? Understandably, you probably didn’t know that this is World Childless Week…
Most of those who have never lived through infertility do not realize that not being able to conceive is not “just” about not having a baby—as utterly heartbreaking as that is. It is a cataclysm in one’s entire life.
In August 2021, my husband and I received a voicemail from our fertility clinic, saying that we had a medical condition that would make conception challenging.
Hello my wild roses! My intention for this story is to share with you some of what I have learned on healing the wounds that can come with being an expansive, soulful human with dreams that don’t always come to fruition in the ways I envisioned.
I never imagined being where I am today. I never imagined the estrangement from the traditional world would be so great, and I never expected the coldness and hardness I experienced by being different.
My grief journey began innocently enough. Someone else posted a pregnancy portrait session they were really proud of.
I am a person who knows
before my eyes flutter open
exactly what time it is when I wake.
If I were to write this then.
It would be full of sorrow, hurt, fear, regret, shock, confusion, longing, heartache, anger, blame, low self worth, trepidation, isolation
I always wanted to be a Mum. When I knew for definite that it would not be possible, all my carefully made plans, my dreams, my hope for my future, all crashed and burned and I felt as if I was left with nothing.
We are the freerunners. We cross the liminal spaces between one generation and the next. We encounter many obstacleson the path through life, but we use our pain, resilience and creativity to overcome them.
My teacher thought, it would be smart, in our grade three
to give us each a seed to grow, and teach responsibility
Keep that vision in your mind,
A rainbow miracle to hold.
If I think it, I can do it.
Isn't that what I've been told?
I’m curious about how this image resonates with all of you. At first glance, it might feel a little demotivational, and you might question, “Will I always grieve this intensely?”
Having a family, children of my own, was what I always wanted for my life. "At least a couple of kids" is what I always said.
Infertility and childlessness are two very distinct words that evoke primitive anxieties. I almost feel sorry for them.
Since the start of my journey in coming to terms with accepting my childlessness, I've used watercolour painting as a means of healing my soul.
A decade or so after realizing my diva-like, fibroid-riddled uterus would never perform, menopause offered a welcome certainty after years of endless wondering.
You know those moments that divide your life into who you were before and who you become?
My journey of acceptance as a #womanofcolour who is #childlessnotbychoice began in August 2017, approximately 19 months after officially ending all attempts to have a child of my own.
I started Childless Voices online during the Pandemic, where childless women met weekly to sing on Zoom throughout lockdown.
It’s been a gradual process, and has taken a lot of years, but I seem to have reached a point where the grief has faded somewhat.
I married a boy I’d gone to school with at 24. We planned to have children at 29, but instead we were separated by then.
In January this year I had a ceremony to mark my transition from potential mother to childless woman.
Together, Jody and Catherine-Emmanuelle discuss what has helped them move forward in their childless journey.
I pulled down my knickers and no longer found her there waiting for me. She was late, very very late.