Keira Paterson
Books. No Kids.
I've always been a big reader, and a big library user. I have membership cards for libraries all over the place - places I've lived, places I visit regularly, and some special ones like the National Library in Australia, and the Library of Congress in the US.
For me, reading is my favourite way to learn, an entertainment, and a balm when I'm struggling. I always have a book on the go.
However, since recognising my childlessness my love of reading took a hit for a little while, as I found it harder and harder to choose books. So many books seem to have a miracle baby ending, a pregnancy plot line, or a "life's meaning is parenthood" theme, even in my preferred genres of mystery, spy novels, and science fiction.
And the library itself can become a difficult place, too, for the grieving childless person. I suddenly noticed how centred around children they are - colourful posters, games area, homework groups, story time, sing-a-longs, self-help and cooking sections full of titles about pregnancy, feeding your baby, cooking for fussy kids, and dealing with the transition into motherhood.
I don't begrudge parents and children these amenities - everyone should be getting what they need from our community spaces. But that leads me here: what do we need from our libraries, as childless people?
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On one recent visit to my local library, while I was flipping through books trying to see if pregnancy is mentioned without ruining the ending, I thought again how good it would be if there were easier ways to get what I needed from my library. I daydreamed of a little icon on book spines, warning of miracle babies, or announcing the safety of a book for people like us; of librarians with lengthy lists of "safe" options for the childless tucked behind the desk for anyone in need.
On my way out, I noticed the display area at the entrance.
My local library system has a display that changes often and displays books and resources on a theme: LGBTIQ pride, Diwali, Christmas, Ramadan, Lunar new year, International Women's Day, Summer reads, and all sorts of others. And I thought, "Why not have a display for World Childless Week?". It could have information, a display of self-help, childless-friendly fiction, and books featuring childless or child free protagonists. It seemed like an excellent place to start.
I've always been that person who stands up for others, who gets involved and tries to improve access and equality. This part of myself also shrunk while I was in the worst of my childless grief, so I was excited to feel that little spark - why not stand up for us too? I emailed the libraries in my local library system, gave them some statistics about the size of the childless community, and asked if they'd consider doing a display for World Childless Week in September.
It took a bit more prompting on my part to get them to consider it, but one library said yes, and the librarian who got back to me is talking to the other libraries to encourage them to do the same! A little persistence is often needed when your audience is busy.
I'll be helping them by sending a list of great books for the display, including a few purchase suggestions (so please get in touch if you have some recommendations). My next step is to get in touch with the next closest library systems and take this idea wherever I can.
I'd love to see you take up the baton and ask your local library to show some support to their childless members as well. We are part of the community, worthy of notice and inclusion. We deserve to have our community spaces reflect this part of our selves.
Keira has now taken an extra step and set up her website Books. No kids.
Books. No kids. has two aims:
To help childless and childfree people find books that reflect their lives and experiences, and are 'safer' to read for people in deep grief.
Running the Inclusive Libraries Project, to encourage libraries to stock books by, for, and about childless and childfree people, and embrace us as part of their communities.
Please take a look and perhaps, get involved.