One Day at a Time by Jennifer Parrish


My name is Jennifer and I am childless not by choice.

I am childless not by choice due to infertility.  I was surprised to learn that only about 10% of those who are CNBC is because of infertility.  

Both my husband and I have fertility issues.  My husband has a low sperm count and motility issues.  I have a low hormone level and fluid-filled fallopian tubes.  Both of our parents also had trouble getting pregnant.

When my husband and I decided to try fertility treatments as one last shot, we found out about his low sperm count and motility issues after lab work.  Male infertility plays a role in about half of couples who are having trouble conceiving.  The fertility doctor also did numerous tests on me and found that I had an extremely low AMH (anti-Mullerian hormone) count.  Or, as the doctor put it, at the age of 39, I had the ovaries of a 49-year-old.  We would have to use an egg donor for IVF.  He also did a transvaginal ultrasound and found that I had fluid in both of my fallopian tubes (hydrosalpinx).  Hydrosalpinx is a common cause of infertility.  He explained to us that if we wanted to start IVF, I would need to have my tubes removed because the fluid would be harmful to the embryo.  At that point, we were planning on doing IVF, so I had both of my fallopian tubes removed.  After the surgery, my doctor said that he didn’t know how I wasn’t in severe pain because my tubes were extremely damaged.  As I recovered, my husband and I discussed our next steps and prayed about what we should do.  Ultimately, we decided that we didn’t feel comfortable with using an egg donor and chose to say no to any further fertility treatment.

We are trying to find peace and joy in being CNBC.  We take it one day at a time, some days are good and some days are bad.  But, we are moving forward, allowing ourselves to grieve our dream, and finding joy in all circumstances!!