Four months after our second and final round of unsuccessful IVF treatment. I decided to publish an article for World Childless week (Path To Acceptance). It was quite out of character for me as I tend to shy away from all things 'Childless' while I processed my grief.
I am quite an open person and so many of my friends had walked the journey with me, however although they were aware of my story I had never showed them the emotional turmoil I had went through or continued to go through as I navigated through my new Childless Not by Choice label.
I honestly believe that publishing that article was one of the greatest steps towards my own healing. I found writing the article very cathartic, especially as I knew my story was out in the world and joining a community of other voices.
However where I found the most benefit was sending that article to all my friends (from the comfort of my own home and not facing any of them).
With one click I was able to show my friends all the emotional turmoil I had went through and the grief I was in, something I could never do face to face as I really struggle with showing vulnerability. This made me feel visible and in some instances helped some of my friendships that I had withdraw from. These were primarily friends who had just had babies, they were able to see my true pain an be more sensitive to me and not be offended by me not wanting to be around or talk about their babies. We were able to make pleasantries and then move the conversation on to Childfree topics.
I am so grateful to Steph and World Childless Week and the platform they gave me
J White