Stay still


Sabrina Radhia Behrens


I don’t want to sing no more

I don’t want to dance

I don’t want to move on

I don’t want no second chance

I don’t want to see a tomorrow

I don’t want anyone to take away my sorrow

I don’t want to hope

I don’t want to cope

I don’t want to try no more

I don’t want to reach for the sky no more

I just want to sit and decay

Like you did

 

I want to watch shit everyday

So I can make it through the day

So the One who remembers you remains

 

I don’t want to sing no more

I don’t want to dance

I don’t want to joke nor jump nor laugh

I don’t want to be reasonable nor brav [1]

I dont want to sit on my pretty balcony

Watch the birds sing their beautiful melody

I don’t want to enjoy the sun on my skin

I don’t want to go for a swim

I just want to give in

 

I don’t want to learn no more

I am done

I don’t want to grow

Since you stopped doing so      

 

I want to stare at the wall and feel sore

I want to cry and cry even more

I want to work too much until it pains

I want to stay alone and make everyone go away

I want to mourn your loss every day

Because that makes you somehow stay

With me

And lets you be reality

I want to freeze the moment before your hearts stopped their beat

I don’t want to talk to anyone

I don’t want to eat

I don’t want to dream no more

I don’t want to pray

I don’t want to listen nor see

Any joy or music or beauty

I don’t want to forget or move on

I don’t want to regain courage and be strong

 

I don’t want to sing no more

I don’t want to dance

I don’t want to see no bright future and I don’t care for any possible maybes

All I want to do is to cry forever for my babies

Because if I don’t…

nobody will!

Why should I be healthy and young and sing and dance around when they were ill

I just want to be with them and be like them: forever still


[1] German for “well behaved”, “good-girl”.