Sarah Bradley
Once upon a time there was a little girl called Sarah, who lived with her Mummy and Daddy and sister. She had two Nanas and two Grandads and lots of Aunties and Uncles and Cousins. She loved going to school and learning to read and write. She especially loved writing stories. Sarah had lots of friends who came to play.
She loved playing with her dollies. There was Baby Doll who needed feeding and changing and Baby Beans who was very soft and cuddly. There was the doll’s house family, Mummy, Daddy and lots of children. Later there was Pippa doll who loved to be dressed up and go out with her friends and then Pippa had a husband and a baby and a beautiful house.
Sarah also loved looking at her Mum’s catalogues and choosing her favourite things on each page. Then when the catalogue was out of date, Sarah like to cut out pictures of imaginary families and give them names.
Some of Sarah’s favourite stories were the ones about families; The Family from One End Street, The Bullerby Children, Little House on the Prairie.
Sarah and her sister sometimes imagined they were grown-ups, with husbands and children. They had pretend houses and jobs and took the children out together to the shops and the park. Sarah liked drawing so she drew pictures of the family she would have when she was a Mummy, with a husband and two boys and a girl with imaginary names that changed with every drawing.
When Sarah was almost a grown-up she had a boyfriend. They thought they would get married and have children. They chose the names their children would have and talked about where they would live. They knew they weren’t ready to have children yet though and they knew how to make sure there wouldn’t be a baby. Then Sarah went away to college and they went their separate ways.
Sarah had a great time at college and didn’t really think very much about boyfriends. She made lots of friends and learned how to be a good teacher. After college all of Sarah’s friends got married and had babies and Sarah was a good teacher. Sometimes it was difficult to meet up with those friends because Sarah didn’t know how to talk about husbands and babies.
After a while Sarah got married and was going to have babies, but it wasn’t as easy as she thought it would be. She had dogs and cats though and she loved them a lot.
Then one day, Sarah’s husband went off and had a baby with someone else. Sarah was sadder than she had ever been before, but she didn’t tell anyone because she felt ashamed. She pretended she was ok.
Sarah’s sister had twin babies, and Sarah was very happy that she was an Aunty. She knew that she had lots of love to give her niece and nephew.
Many years later, Sarah knew that life was good, but something felt heavy and there was still a lot of sadness inside.
One day, Sarah read about something called Childlessness and she realised that was what had happened to her. She discovered that there were lots of other people like her and it was good to talk with them. Sarah also talked to a lady who was very good at listening and lots of Sarah’s sadness came flooding out and Sarah felt lighter.
Then Sarah told lots of other people what had happened to her, and she didn’t feel ashamed anymore. She realised that ever since she was a little girl she had thought her life would turn out in a particular way, but it hadn’t and although that had made her very sad, she was ok.
So, Sarah set out to build a different kind of life.
She didn’t have a husband or children, but she had friends and family and a house and a garden and some cats and books and all her stuff. She had independence and confidence, so she did lots of lovely things because she didn’t have to spend all her money and time on children.
She was still friends with lots of the people she had known for a long time, and as their children were now grown-ups, they talked about other things and Sarah could join in. Sarah was still a good teacher but after a while she went back to college and learned how to be a Life Coach, so she could help other people who felt stuck or sad.
Sarah lived in a lovely village where she felt part of a community with friends and things to join in and do. As she got older, Sarah didn’t care so much what other people thought about her, so she wasn’t bothered when people asked her if she had children or if they thought it was weird that she lived on her own. She quite liked being different to everybody else.
Sarah still loved writing, and she realised that all the things that had happened to her could be a story that other people might be interested in, so she decided to write a book about Moving Forward from Childlessness.
Sarah had learned that the life that she imagined when she was younger didn’t happen for everybody, but that didn’t mean that life couldn’t be full of fun and fulfilment and love.
Occasionally Sarah still felt sad that she didn’t have children, but most of the time she just lived Happily Ever After.
