Laura Chin-See

It's been just over a year since we decided to end our fertility treatment. It was a really hard decision to make, especially as we were preparing to do a 5th round of IVF.

Do I regret it?

No, but I do regret not forcing an earlier endometriosis/fibroids/adenomyosis diagnosis. I spent 12 years having 10 surgeries to temporarily 'fix' my issues e.g. remove any visible endometriosis, separate any scar tissue. I believed it would fix my issues every single time. Every surgery and every treatment e.g. Zoladex, Prostap, Clomid made my periods so much worse. They were unbearable. Every round of IVF made my periods a lot worse too. Neither of us regret ending our fertility journey because it was so hard mentally and physically. Also, there were so many things against us e.g. my uterine lining was too thin and we needed to wait for an egg donor. I would've needed surgery to temporarily fix my issues again. . . It just felt very negative.

Try forcing a smile when you’re in the worst pain you’ve ever felt, going through IVF treatments while trying to hold down a job, and navigate pregnancy announcements.

It goes back further though

Instead of investigating my period problems, my GP put me on the pill at a young age. I wish I'd pushed for a proper diagnosis, instead of staying on the pill, and remaining unaware of the potential issues I was about to face.

"It's a sad story, not a sad life."

I'm always thinking about this quote by @Bloomingwithcare.

Yes I still get triggered by pregnancy announcements, and feel a bit frustrated at being labelled as 'child-less' but overall, I'm trying my best to live life. I'm really trying not to be sad.

I'm putting energy into writing about my health journey when I can. I feel like I've really built up a great network of followers through Instagram. I'm also looking after my mum on her dementia journey, and mentally preparing to get back into the world of work (it's hard!).