Ruth Guest

You simply cannot imagine
how much it costs
when you ask that question.
the suckerpunch
the wound opening
the avalance of envy and bitterness
You clearly do… have kids
otherwise you wouldn’t ask
I now…take a breath
a slow deliberate suffocating breath
my defences cracking
I brace myself
a dilemma raging in my head
calmness unravelling
and you’re waiting
Should I be sarcastic, jocular
Should I be honest, even brutal
Should I try to explain
Can I even explain
why should I have to explain
and you’re still waiting
Whatever jumble of words
comes out of my mouth
this conversation
will now make a handbrake turn
Screeching,
like nails on a blackboard
You will stop
and then,
then you will show me, almost certainly
that you don’t comprehend
and you should for that
be forever thankful