They want to help!

to fix your brokenness, to get you back into the flow

so you aren’t uncomfortable (to them) anymore

And because otherwise, 

maybe something’s wrong with you.

 

And even your closest friends, who love you deeply 

may well-meaning say...

Just let it be, let it go, and then it will happen for you!

There’s a bigger plan, there’s a way, they say

 

But when it still doesn’t,

 

(because they want to help!) they say…

Have you tried?

What about?

I know someone who...

You should just (fill in the blank) 

and…

When you’re least expecting, it might!

or, (and the most devastating of all)

If it’s meant to be, it will be.

 

but it wasn’t,

and it won’t 

 

because you really can’t, and you really don’t always get what you want

Even if you beg

Even if you promise

Even if you slowly and then quickly implode

Even if you sob 

and feel forsaken 

and feel so unbelievably angry

Even if you disappear for years at a time

 

And then eventually, they stop saying 

And eventually, when you listen - but not to anyone else

 

eventually

 

After lifetimes

After mountains and deserts

After total, completely total, destruction

After there’s nothing left to feel, not shame, not hope, not jealousy, not self-pity, not anger and not even uncomfortable

A slight shift will surprise you 

and there you are, even if you will never be that other you again, the you before they all said

 

And you will 

slowly, 

slowly, 

slowly 

and then suddenly 

 

know

 

It will be

I will be

(and you will be)...

I am

 

alright.

Anonymous