Memories come and go

I am back there, lying in the bath. The violins sweeping and a piano softly playing.

The ordeal is over, but the real pain is just about to begin.

Six years ago now, but the pain can still feel so intense, so sharp.

I remember it all over again, how much I have lost.

Its mind blowing.

The tears flow.

I have come so far, healed so much, but the loss is still there.

I’ve just learned to live around it.

It’s resurfaced again to remind me it’s there, for me to remember our lost children.

How much I love them, would’ve loved a life with them.

There is nothing else to say, nothing can take that pain away.

It can still take my breath away.

Rachel Harrod (Rachel Ellie Bear)